# Shaving legs onboard?



## Perithead

Well, my girlfreind and I are sitting around and talking about the things that a person takes for grandted in the house that is not avaliable onboard a boat while cruising. The main thing is showering. Our boat has a shower but like most other boats it doesnt have an unlimited amount of fresh water on board, so showering with meek amounts of water is something that you must get used too.

One topic that came up is shaving legs. What methods do you ladies use to shave your legs while using a minimal amount of fresh water. Have you tried it with salt water? Does it work well? Sting?

Thanks and any replies would be much appreciated by females or males who have observed this being done.


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## gypsywomen

You can fill up a cup with warm water, splash a little on your legs, put on the shaving cream and shave use the rest of the water in the cup to rinse off your razor, then you are done. With just one cup of water.
I know this not from living on a boat but from shaving while I watch TV in the bedroom. hehe


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## tdw

Perithead said:


> Well, my girlfreind and I are sitting around and talking about the things that a person takes for grandted in the house that is not avaliable onboard a boat while cruising. The main thing is showering. Our boat has a shower but like most other boats it doesnt have an unlimited amount of fresh water on board, so showering with meek amounts of water is something that you must get used too.
> 
> One topic that came up is shaving legs. What methods do you ladies use to shave your legs while using a minimal amount of fresh water. Have you tried it with salt water? Does it work well? Sting?
> 
> Thanks and any replies would be much appreciated by females or males who have observed this being done.


I'll put this matter of supreme importance to the Ms Wombat and see what she says. I can tell you that salt water is not the answer. I have a feeling the Ms W will concur with Gypsy Womans method but confirmation will follow. But what of a Brazilian he asked ? Ouch.


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## TSOJOURNER

You're right Mr Wombat - this is a matter of supreme importance !!

When cruising with limited fresh water I shampoo & condition my hair; shave my legs with shampoo lather all with salt water. Then I just have a quick rinse with fresh water so I only use about 4-5 litres of fresh water.


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## Sasha_V

My wife tends to use pumice stone as part of bathing and exfoliating when water is scarce.

I asked, That was her answer....And I have noticed her doing it, so there you go. apparently pumice works really well at removing leg hair once you make it a habbit (as in do it while the new hairs are still soft and not expecially strong).

Going for a good skid on the deck-tread proabably will not achieve the same results...



Sasha


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## chucklesR

Electric Razor for Ms. ChucklesR, legs and elsewhere - it has minimal draw on the solar panels. 

I shave my face with a normal blade, dry or salt water.


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## Faster

My wife shaves her legs sitting on the side of the inflatable in salt water. Try using hair conditioner rather than shave cream.. works well and doesn't leave suds on the water.


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## AboardIndigo

What about not shaving them...

...whaaaaaaaaaa haaaaaaaaa haaaa.


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## TrueBlue

Wife always used those pink, disposable razors in the aft head shower for her legs and underarms - while practicing frugal use of onboard water reserves of course . . . in spite of the 140 gal fresh water tank.

Smooth legs are more than a luxury - nothing worse than V-berth nub-rash.


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## camaraderie

Chuckles " I shave my face with a normal blade, dry or salt water. "

How do you get the top of yer head so smooth?


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## sailingdog

Cam—

I was being good and not saying anything... and then you go and say it anyways... 

CP—

When my better half and I were engaged, but living 3000 miles apart, she'd occasionally use my razor for her legs... and I've never seen a razor get dull so fast... women must have silicon carbide for leg hair...cause it dulls a razor faster than anything else I've ever seen. Two day leg stubble might as well be 80-grit sand paper.


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## sailortjk1

sailingdog said:


> ... and I've never seen a razor get dull so fast... women must have silicon carbide for leg hair...cause it dulls a razor faster than anything else I've ever seen. Two day leg stubble might as well be 80-grit sand paper.


Wow Dog, 
your not making very many friends with the ladies.
Others might think this, but would never say it out loud.


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## chucklesR

Sand paper (220 grit) - what's everyone else use?


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## sailingdog

Chuckles, do you finish with a coat of Turtle wax?? 

TJK-

Like I'm going to start being PC now... Right...


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## TrueBlue

chucklesR said:


> Sand paper (220 grit) - what's everyone else use?


Try this bad boy . . . just make sure you keep it moving, quickly!


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## chucklesR

I put the sand paper on my pillow, the next morning, I put milk on my head and the cat gets the rest.
I am not loosing my hair, I know where they went and decided to let them be free.

Roman's used to use flaming sticks to shave (burn off) hair from legs, pits and pubes - any ladies ever try that?


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## ehmanta

When cruising, you have lots of free time, right??? What about tweezers...one-at-a-time


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## sailingdog

TB-

Wouldn't this be far better:










Would be easier to clean up after too.



TrueBlue said:


> Try this bad boy . . . just make sure you keep it moving, quickly!


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## sailingdog

A bit sadistic, isn't it? Hey TJK, what does your better half think of this idea???



ehmanta said:


> When cruising, you have lots of free time, right??? What about tweezers...one-at-a-time


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## TrueBlue

SD,
Seems to me that tool would remove a bit more than unwanted hair.  

With my heat-gun method of depilation, the ladies could also benefit by achieving a nice, healthy tan.


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## sailortjk1

I thought I had a picture of Julie actually shaving.
This is a close as I could find. (not a very flattering picture of my wife; I hope she doen't hate me for this one)
The girl's lounge around on floaties and wash thier hair and shave, IN THE LAKE, where you are supposed to. Gotta love fresh water.


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## ReverendMike

ehmanta said:


> When cruising, you have lots of free time, right??? What about tweezers...one-at-a-time


Heck, my wife does this now... must mean she has too much free time! (It also proves that she's tougher than me)


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## chucklesR

Isn't it sad that altho posted in herSailNet, and a question posed to the female posters, only one has responded - and that us typical males on the forum have taken the thread over and are now, true to form, posting answers that are truly ridiculous (and I will add, consist on run on sentences with no whitespace and bad punctuation).

Oxaclic Acid anyone? Ten minutes in a bucket bath using saltwater and tequilla.


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## TSOJOURNER

Enough of that tequilla and you won't care about shaving!


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## chucklesR

They (the shavee) might not - but the guys will (note previous comparision to 80 grit sandpaper).


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## sailingdog

Of course, you could avoid the whole situation by using either electrolytic hair removal prior to departure or a depilatory cream, like VEET, while cruising. 

TB-

The random orbital sander was for Chuckles, not the ladies... whose skin is far too delicate to use either a heat gun or sander on.


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## chucklesR

Continuing on the hijacked thread venue -

TJK, the question was specifically shaving onboard. I can not help but notice that unless you sail on a inflatable lounge chair your wife and daughter(?) are clearly not onboard and therefore your solution is not viable or pertinent. 

Certainly not as much as my oxaclic acid solution anyway


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## sailortjk1

Take a bucket and fill it with Fresh Lake Water, than shave till your hearts content. There, how is that.
Man you guys/girls that sail in the salt don't know what you are missing.
And yes Chuckles is 100% correct, we have destroyed this thread.
Sorry ladies, it is after all in HERSAILNET.


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## chucklesR

And where or where would you store that bucket of fresh lake water while sailing around in the West Indies?

(sorry couldn't resist, a bit of the devil in me today)


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## sailingdog

Of course, along the lines of the tweezer torture method, they could always use something like this:










Requires no water... topical anesthetics yes, but no water.


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## chucklesR

Those are popular in Europe. When I lived in Sicily the local ladies used them plus a spray of some type. The spray was something that kept the hair from growing back as quick or reduced the thickness or something.

This being before my current marriage I can highly recommend it from the guy's point of view - it produces superior results - and when my girlfriend used it on her wherever's I didn't feel a thing.


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## sailingdog

I agree, the disc things work quite well... and prevent the 80-grit burn... but I understand that using it the first time stings quite a bit... from one of my ex's experience. The hair is supposed to grow back finer than it does when shaving. Shaving IMHO makes the hair coarser and more abrasive...


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## chucklesR

Depending on where they use it (this is a family site) watching or just thinking about a woman using an epilator (sp) can cause permanent mental scars. 
I believe on the lat's and att's site it's called the low drag look, popular today IMHO.


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## AjariBonten

Well, it's certainly easy to see why the ladies are leaving THIS one alone........


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## chucklesR

And we hoped they were taking notes so they would have ideas next time they found themselves stuck at sea with furry appendages.

You mean they aren't reading?


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## AjariBonten

chucklesR said:


> You mean they aren't reading?


   

You guys better hope that reading is ALL they do ................


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## sailingdog

Not going there... really not going there... where'd I put the bottle of Psychlorox again???



chucklesR said:


> Depending on where they use it (this is a family site) watching or just thinking about a woman using an epilator (sp) can cause permanent mental scars.
> I believe on the lat's and att's site it's called the low drag look, popular today IMHO.


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## Freesail99

Yet another thread that makes me wonder why all the guys are answering instead of the women; and having a good time doing it.


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## tdw

Freesail99 said:


> Yet another thread that makes me wonder why all the guys are answering instead of the women; and having a good time doing it.


Its a bit like 'why do dogs lick their balls ?', really. Cos they can.

As for dulling of the blades, sheeesh. The Ms W forgot her razor when we went away and I'd only taken one blade. Anyway, the beard is coming along quite nicely thanks.


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## sailingdog

My better half was adamant about me shaving regularly...


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## Valiente

tdw said:


> Its a bit like 'why do dogs lick their balls ?',


Because no one else will?


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## TSOJOURNER

You guys are missing the romance of sailing and being contained in a tubular enclosure with a woman with no place to run. Do it for them. Starting with hot towels, hot water from the engine, I wrap her legs and let sit. Then using peach flavored "Skintimate" moisturizing gel, gently stroke her legs with a Gillette "good news" razor til all the offending ruff is removed, this is followed by massaging in "Suave" skin treatment Cocoa Butter to soften the skin and prevent razor burn. 

For bikini waxes, I . . . but that's another story.


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## sailingdog

Mind you, Ian is also the one recommending satin sheets on a boat... I hope that he's got some decent lee cloths made up... or the first swell will leave you dumped off the berth.


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## sailaway21

My wife uses a Black & Decker HedgeTrimmer. You guys oughta see my inverter!


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## bubb2

Let it grow until you can make use of the 









think of the water saving!


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## artbyjody

I always mix 20% Nair into the suntan lotion.... since I refuse to wear the stuff... works out great with them women


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## TSOJOURNER

Dog, in a Hardin 45 we don't know what lee cloths are as the aft cabin measures 13X12 with the bed athwartships, lottsa room to roll around in (too many maritinias) , and mind you, I didn't recommend them, I simply mentioned some of the problems with dragging the laundry over the side. But, Satin sheets sure are coooool.


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## sailortjk1

ianhlnd said:


> You guys are missing the romance of sailing and being contained in a tubular enclosure with a woman with no place to run. Do it for them. Starting with hot towels, hot water from the engine, I wrap her legs and let sit. Then using peach flavored "Skintimate" moisturizing gel, gently stroke her legs with a Gillette "good news" razor til all the offending ruff is removed, this is followed by massaging in "Suave" skin treatment Cocoa Butter to soften the skin and prevent razor burn.
> 
> For bikini waxes, I . . . but that's another story.


There is no fooling us Ian, you are full of crap.
I don't believe a word of it. The only reason you have women on board is because you promise them a rewarding modeling career, than they take their clothes off, you snap a couple of photos, and its off to do the dirty dance.


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## TSOJOURNER

Sailortjk1: I never snap only a couple photos.


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## sailortjk1

I'm glad you have a sense of Humor.
Good day to you my friend.


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## chucklesR

Satin sheets and low drag effect, a pleasant mix, and yes Ian, she letsme do all the 'work', it's worth it..


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## TSOJOURNER

try waxing instead - lasts much longer and needs no water at all!


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## chucklesR

I've been around a bit. I've never met a woman that waxed. My wife and I caught an episode of Pen and Teller's Bull$hit on HBO where they demo's a Brazilan wax rather explictedly. Not a chance that happens anywhere near my wife.
I'll stick to Ian's method, we both leave happy and live happy.


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## TSOJOURNER

Hey wombat -- all this time I thought it was because they couldn't make a fist!!


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## boatguy30

Believe it or not, salt water works very well! We cruised 2 years and my legs were never softer. I use a quality razor (venus, blades are available in large quantity at Costco) and usually hair conditioner because its easier.


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## Joel73

You guys are hillarious! The whole lot of you!


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## Robby Barlow

Tweezers sound OK for some woman, but in this case I would recommend using this.


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## SVAuspicious

I have a fold-down stainless steel step in the shower for ladies to rest their foot on. That is my contribution. The technical details I leave to them.


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## camaraderie

* Women With Hairy Legs Flocking To Canada *

WHITEHORSE, Yukon Territory (Wireless Flash) - The sight of a woman with hairy legs usually grosses people out, but at one festival in Canada, it will earn the ape-like woman a prize. The 45th Annual Yukon Sourdough Rendezvous in Whitehorse will begin Wednesday (Feb. 24) and one of the biggest events is the "Women's Hairy Leg Contest." 
In the contest, the hairy-limbed ladies compete in three different categories that consist of "the densest hair," "the longest hair" and "the most horrific hair." 
The winner in each category is determined by a barber in the small town and receives a gold plated razor. 
Festival spokesman Harold Sher expects more than 15 girls to compete and admits it's one of the more popular spectator events at the festival, which also includes the "Beard Growing Contest" and the "Flour Packing Contest." 
More than 20,000 people are expected to flock to the three-day festival - which celebrates the loads of people who traveled through the area during the Gold Rush


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## millerman

This was one entertaining thread, I must admit. Made me laugh.....too funny.

It's one of those things you wouldn't really think about when you're prepping to leave off shore but I guess it could be an issue.

Personally, I like Ian's suggestion, it's bound to win me some points for those nights I wander back late, full of rum, from the local marina tavern...LOL


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## chucklesR

Really? You thought we were being funny?


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## millerman

chucklesR said:


> Really? You thought we were being funny?


I'm presuming the handle says it all?


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## chucklesR

Well, yes, but this time I was being serious - stubble on the Admirals legs can cause untold of problems such as her sarong to not billow gracefully in the breeze, not to mention ripping the sheet hardened calluses off my hands.


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## Robby Barlow

Chuck, I was just wondering, as your avatar is only neck upwards, do you also shave ya legs?


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## TSOJOURNER

Millerman40


> Personally, I like Ian's suggestion, it's bound to win me some points for those nights I wander back late


Might win you something better than you think Guys, let's face it, we usually have to half drag the other half to the boat, and to do a 3 night crossing, forget it! SOooo, I pamper 'em. It's better than a Princess Cruise with gourmet meals and spa to boot, never a problem getting female crew.


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## XTR

gypsywomen said:


> You can fill up a cup with warm water, splash a little on your legs, put on the shaving cream and shave use the rest of the water in the cup to rinse off your razor, then you are done. With just one cup of water.
> I know this not from living on a boat but from shaving while I watch TV in the bedroom. hehe


Watched my wife use this method last week.


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## sanctuarysam

*uhm...*

ya know..i try to avoid shaving my legs..or other body parts when i sail...
i did however shave off my beard..now just rocking a 'stache.
my legs are pretty sexy..hair or no...


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## artbyjody

sanctuarysam said:


> ya know..i try to avoid shaving my legs..or other body parts when i sail...
> i did however shave off my beard..now just rocking a 'stache.
> my legs are pretty sexy..hair or no...


Does that mean you sail often, only before breakfast.. or just on special occasion???


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## Boasun

Are we using: Straight Razors?  Safety Razors? Electric Razors? Tweezers? or one of those hair pulling machines?  Waxing?


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## sanctuarysam

artbyjody said:


> Does that mean you sail often, only before breakfast.. or just on special occasion???


hey...
uhm...can ya 'splain that to me lucy?
hey..i hate shaving..so i only do it when absotively, posolutely necessary.
sportin a 3 day growth now..
doing food photo shoot this weekend..and lots of wine w/ some friends.
am gonna try to go in a few weeks.


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## TSOJOURNER

*I use a solar shower.*

I use a solar shower, wet my legs, use shaving cream, and rinse. I don't do it in the shower cause it clogs the drain, I do it in the cockpit. 
Hehehe I think maybe the guys in here know about shaving their legs more than we do? Since they are posting more than we are lol


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## hellosailor

Guys on soccer teams tend to shave their legs. It beats all hell out of ripping tape off hair!


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## sarafinadh

Oh this thread is Soooooo ripe for some serious chop bustin! Man, you guys just leave yourselves open for the easy shots!!

I am going to rise above it and resist the delicious temptation.

On shore waxing happens. Who ever said brazilian's are imaginary has no clue...

on board a good remedy would be similar to the earlier pumice suggestion or the facetious sand paper comments. I love this gizz;








No water at all and nice smooth results that grow out pretty soft. not as nice as a wax job, but way softer than a razor. and no burn. basically just really fine fine grit finishing sand paper on a flexible rubber gripper.

And tweezers do an excellent job on the very delicate areas that would not take well to abrading.... what I can't reach I just get help with....
; -}


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## Maine Sail

Two words... Laser Treatments!!! My wife has never been happier, so money well spent, and no shaving on-board or ever....


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## hellosailor

"Laser Treatments!!!"
Ah, there you go! The answer to all those "How can I make money while cruising?" threads. Just bring the laser thingy and a big genset on board, and go around bringing peace and enlightenment to other boats!


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## Melrna

I am not as nice as Sara is. Sorry just part of my nature. This post cracks me up first of all. Good subject but 98% of the posts are from the guys. I am definitely starting to worry about some of you. Your knowledge base is incredible. Have to admit, I learned a thing or two. Having said that as Lucy from Peanuts *"Psychiatric Help 5¢" "The Doctor Is In," cost of psychiatric help 5 cent."!*
Some of you guys need to see me to discuss a few things!  
A worried Sailorette


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## shayw

A lighter, the small ones. It burns off the hair and doesn't hurt. Weird but affective on the legs, haven't tried it on the under arms.


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## elkscout

angelmorland86 said:


> I don't think using salt water in shaving your legs is a good Idea, salt water could make your skin sticky and it would be harder and difficult to shave. instead of using salt water, why not just bring with you a shaving cream, and just wash it after shaving, it wouldn't hurt to carry with you a little shaving cream before you board the boat, would it?


I think the thread originally started as a comparison of living on land w/out constraints to that aboard a boat, probably at sea was implied, w/ limited resources, particularly fresh water, as well as little storage.

I suppose you could wipe the shaving cream off with a towel, or even one of Ian's satin sheets. 

A couple of others in this thread suggested salt water worked rather well. As far as water goes, it's often in the form hot water (on land) and used to heat the blade and precondition the face/skin, i.e. taking a hot steaming washcloth and applying it to the skin, which I believe was alluded to earlier in this thread


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## Jace2

Okay, here goes. I'll brace for the shocks.

I have a thing for hair. As far as I'm concerned, the women can go without shaving the underarms. The legs, well, calves only. I like hairy thighs . . . and, um . . . well, you get the picture. 

Before you make me walk the plank, just think of the convenience, ladies. Your man likes you hairy. Unless you're stepping out on him, I would think it would be a dream. No?


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## mdbee

"marketing"

"It began with the May,1915 edition of Harper's Bazaar magazine that featured a model sporting the latest fashion. She wore a sleeveless evening gown that exposed, for the first time in fashion, her bare shoulders, and her (shaved) armpits. Shocking at first, this soon caught on. At the same time a marketing executive with the Wilkinson Sword Company, which made razor blades for men, designed a campaign to convince women that underarm hair was unfeminine. *By 1917 the sales of razor blades doubled as women conformed to this feminine stereotype of shaving under their arms."*

Shaving History « Fluffy Woman


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## zeehag

i always shaved dry , against the proper direction, so i never had a problem. stings a tad in salt water the same day, but , otherwise--no problem. and in the cockpit so no hairs in the bilges...


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## helenwiley

OK...here's what I do. Forget the water. Use hand cream. You not only get shaved but also take care of dry skin at the same time.


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## Maine Sail

How come more women have not discovered laser treatment...? A lot of OBGYN's are offering it these days as are lots of other doctors. IPL works well too but arguably requires a couple more visits than laser. The price has come way down over the last 5 years.

My friend even had his back done. He's no longer a gorilla with his shirt off and women & children no longer run away when he's on a beach......  I think it cost him $1200.00 total...

The up front cost was a bit tough but it has been one of those things my wife try's to persuade all her friends to do. Many now have and they can't believe they did not do it sooner.... Money well spent!!!! Never shave again.....


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## Donna_F

Maine Sail said:


> The up front cost was a bit tough but it has been one of those things my wife try's to persuade all her friends to do. Many now have and they can't believe they did not do it sooner.... Money well spent!!!! Never shave again.....


I believe in redundancy. Long leg hair can be a backup to the tell tales.

Don't get me wrong, I do shave, but I can't imagine caring that much about leg hair that I'd spend that amount to have it removed.


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## bobnpaula

We have 120 gals fresh water. Here's what I do: stand under shower in head. Quickly get entire body and head wet. Shut off water. Shampoo/condition hair. Leave conditioner on hair. Soap up body. Put small amount shaving cream (or body lotion) on legs. Shave legs using pink throwaway razor. Once legs (and armpits) are done, run water again, and quickly rinse entire body. Done, and used very little water, but feel nice and clean (and smooth). 
If a nice, hot day, you can do this same method on the stern platform with the stern shower. Daytime... bathing suit. Nighttime... whatever. 
On our old boat, I have done this same method with a solar shower up on deck.
We also like Savon de Mer, all in one shampoo/soap that works well with salt water. 
Here's to more women piping up on this thread!
Paula


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## zeehag

i wont shave in my shower as the water runs off into a sump for pump to remove from boat. hair makes clogs and nastiness in this sump--therefore-- not done inboard. isnt how much water i can carry--160 gallons, but the pump for removal i am concerned with at this point. is severely less pricey to shave outside than it is to replace another pump....


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## Aussie escapade

Veet hair removal cream? Spray it on and wipe it off with sponge provided. Good enough job for when you are at sea!


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## shadowraiths

mdbee said:


> "marketing"
> 
> "It began with the May,1915 edition of Harper's Bazaar magazine that featured a model sporting the latest fashion. She wore a sleeveless evening gown that exposed, for the first time in fashion, her bare shoulders, and her (shaved) armpits. Shocking at first, this soon caught on. At the same time a marketing executive with the Wilkinson Sword Company, which made razor blades for men, designed a campaign to convince women that underarm hair was unfeminine. *By 1917 the sales of razor blades doubled as women conformed to this feminine stereotype of shaving under their arms."*
> 
> Shaving History « Fluffy Woman


LOL. Thanks for this! Seriously.

That said, I don't shave. And I run around in shorts and tank tops all the time. Then again, am not really "_hairy_" so to speak, and never have been. In any event, back when I was falling for the feminine stereotype... or rather regularly wore hose for work, I used a depilatory. Nair, neet/veet, whatever. Primarily bc I hated razor burn, and those always left my skin very soft. So... if I did feel the urge to "_shave_" while aboard, I would use the depilatory. Anyway, that's my 2¢, fwiw.


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## KelleyG

I'm preparing to live aboard my boat for about six months and this was definitely a topic that was on the top of my list to uncover. Have any of the ladies converted to waxing their legs? Heating up the wax on the stove and using that way? What are the thoughts on that process? Just trying to see what my best options are. 

Thanks. 
Kelley


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## Jace2

Hey Kelley, male live aboarder, here. 

It's so interesting, somewhat inspiring, and not so little 'sexy' to hear a woman is going to live aboard her boat. Very cool, I applaud you. 

Although I do live on my Coronado 25 - which is for sale, by the way - I've been staying with friends while I do some work on their home for them.

As for the waxing, although I have plenty to wax! I don't intend to do so. It would leave my chest a bit cold.

Good luck.


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## zeehag

shave in cockpit or on deck over side so pumps dont collect small hairs....then break down.. dont need that when sailing.
no way on the subject of wax--that is for candles. and woodwork. thankyou.


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## therapy23

It's the long hairs that wind on impeller shafts of pumps. Short shaved hairs from legs, pits, and face won't do anything.


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## therapy23

Aussie escapade said:


> Veet hair removal cream? Spray it on and wipe it off with sponge provided. Good enough job for when you are at sea!


Taken from another forum.....

This review is from: Veet for Men Hair Removal Gel Creme 200 ml (Personal Care) 
After having been told my danglies looked like an elderly rastafarian I decided to take the plunge and buy some of this as previous shaving attempts had only been mildly succesful and I nearly put my back out trying to reach the more difficult bits. Being a bit of a romantic I thought I would do the deed on the missus's birthday as a bit of a treat.

I ordered it well in advance and working in the North sea I considerd myself a bit above some of the characters writing the previous reviews and wrote them off as soft office types...oh my fellow sufferers how wrong I was. I waited until the other half was tucked up in bed and after giving some vague hints about a special surprise I went down to the bathroom. Initially all went well and I applied the gel and stood waiting for something to happen. I didn't have long to wait.

At first there was a gentle warmth which in a matter of seconds was replaced by an intense burning and a feeling I can only describe as like being given a barbed wire wedgie by two people intent on hitting the ceiling with my head. Religion hadn't featured much in my life until that night but I suddenly became willing to convert to any religion to stop the violent burning around the turd tunnel and what seemed like the destruction of the meat and two veg. Struggling to not bite through my bottom lip I tried to wash the gel of in the sink and only succeeded in blocking the plughole with a mat of hair. Through the haze of tears I struggled out of the bathroom across the hall into the kitchen by this time walking was not really possible and I crawled the final yard to the fridge in the hope of some form of cold relief. I yanked the freezer drawer out and found a tub of ice cream, tore the lid of and positioned it under me. The relief was fantastic but only temporary as it melted fairly quickly and the fiery stabbing soon returned .

Due to the shape of the ice cream tub I hadn't managed to give the starfish any treatment and I groped around in the draw for something else as I was sure my vision was going to fail fairly soon.I grabbed a bag of what I later found out was frozen sprouts and tore it open trying to be quiet as I did so.I took a handful of them and tried in vain to clench some between the cheeks of my arse. This was not doing the trick as some of the gel had found it's way up the chutney channel and it felt like the space shuttle was running it's engines behind me.
This was probably and hopefully the only time in my life I was going to wish there was a gay snowman in the kitchen which should give you some idea of the depths I was willing to sink to in order to ease the pain. The only solution my pain crazed mind could come up with was to gently ease one of the sprouts where no veg had gone before.

Unfortunately, alerted by the strange grunts coming from the kitchen the other half chose that moment to come and investigate and was greeted by the sight of me, arse in the air, strawberry ice cream dripping from my bell end pushing a sprout up my arse while muttering..." Ooooh that feels good ". Understandably this was a shock to her and she let out a scream and as I hadn't heard her come in it caused an involutary spasm of shock in myself which resulted in the sprout being ejected at quite some speed in her direction. I can understand that having a sprout farted against your leg at 11 at night in the kitchen probably wasn't the special surprise she was expecting and having to explain to the kids the next day what the strange hollow in the ice cream was didn't improve my status...So to sum it up Veet removes hair, dignity and self respect...


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## zeehag

short hairs make a gunky glop of a mess that does clog bilge and sump pumps. no one shaves inside my boat cabin. ever.


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## hellosailor

"Reading is fundamental."

When the label says "do not use on" there's often a reason.

But I bet you could have some fun pranking in a locker room, putting that stuff in deodorant bottles. (VBG)


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## Capt Len

Heating wax on a stove leaves one to do the goldilocks maneuver. Too cool? Too hot? My partner had a memorable Bikini wax on the way to the Bangkok airport. Fortunately her ability to suffer pain is greater than mine.


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## LeMerovingian

sailortjk1 said:


> Wow Dog,
> your not making very many friends with the ladies.
> Others might think this, but would never say it out loud.


Well I fancy le French women and well grooming..........., 

*Sailortjk *I like your boat!


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## TheTardis

Go with the electric razor. Small draw from the battery and no water usage! Keep the wax on board though girls, good to threaten the men with when they misbehave!


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## Serendipitous

When I'm shaving my legs on board I go in the cockpit in a swimsuit and use the shower head to get my leg just a little bit wet. Then I lather it up (I don't even use shaving cream, just shampoo or conditioner) and while extending my leg across to the other side of the cockpit, shave like normal. To clean my razor after every few swipes I keep a small bowl of fresh water next to me and just dunk it in there a few times. When the leg has been fully shaved I dribble a little water on it from my shower head and wipe clean.


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## mark2gmtrans

therapy23 said:


> Taken from another forum.....
> 
> This review is from: Veet for Men Hair Removal Gel Creme 200 ml (Personal Care)
> After having been told my danglies looked like an elderly rastafarian I decided to take the plunge and buy some of this as previous shaving attempts had only been mildly succesful and I nearly put my back out trying to reach the more difficult bits. Being a bit of a romantic I thought I would do the deed on the missus's birthday as a bit of a treat.
> 
> I ordered it well in advance and working in the North sea I considerd myself a bit above some of the characters writing the previous reviews and wrote them off as soft office types...oh my fellow sufferers how wrong I was. I waited until the other half was tucked up in bed and after giving some vague hints about a special surprise I went down to the bathroom. Initially all went well and I applied the gel and stood waiting for something to happen. I didn't have long to wait.
> 
> At first there was a gentle warmth which in a matter of seconds was replaced by an intense burning and a feeling I can only describe as like being given a barbed wire wedgie by two people intent on hitting the ceiling with my head. Religion hadn't featured much in my life until that night but I suddenly became willing to convert to any religion to stop the violent burning around the turd tunnel and what seemed like the destruction of the meat and two veg. Struggling to not bite through my bottom lip I tried to wash the gel of in the sink and only succeeded in blocking the plughole with a mat of hair. Through the haze of tears I struggled out of the bathroom across the hall into the kitchen by this time walking was not really possible and I crawled the final yard to the fridge in the hope of some form of cold relief. I yanked the freezer drawer out and found a tub of ice cream, tore the lid of and positioned it under me. The relief was fantastic but only temporary as it melted fairly quickly and the fiery stabbing soon returned .
> 
> Due to the shape of the ice cream tub I hadn't managed to give the starfish any treatment and I groped around in the draw for something else as I was sure my vision was going to fail fairly soon.I grabbed a bag of what I later found out was frozen sprouts and tore it open trying to be quiet as I did so.I took a handful of them and tried in vain to clench some between the cheeks of my arse. This was not doing the trick as some of the gel had found it's way up the chutney channel and it felt like the space shuttle was running it's engines behind me.
> This was probably and hopefully the only time in my life I was going to wish there was a gay snowman in the kitchen which should give you some idea of the depths I was willing to sink to in order to ease the pain. The only solution my pain crazed mind could come up with was to gently ease one of the sprouts where no veg had gone before.
> 
> Unfortunately, alerted by the strange grunts coming from the kitchen the other half chose that moment to come and investigate and was greeted by the sight of me, arse in the air, strawberry ice cream dripping from my bell end pushing a sprout up my arse while muttering..." Ooooh that feels good ". Understandably this was a shock to her and she let out a scream and as I hadn't heard her come in it caused an involutary spasm of shock in myself which resulted in the sprout being ejected at quite some speed in her direction. I can understand that having a sprout farted against your leg at 11 at night in the kitchen probably wasn't the special surprise she was expecting and having to explain to the kids the next day what the strange hollow in the ice cream was didn't improve my status...So to sum it up Veet removes hair, dignity and self respect...


Holy Moses and the burning bush Batman!!!!

I am oh so glad I am not in an office where anyone could have heard me snorting and laughing as I read this tale of woe and misery...oh BTW this is just one more reason to have a watermaker on board LOL.


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## hellosailor

Sounds like the usual urban myth, unless it was taken from Fools Rush In forum. Pretty much all depilatories make it Real Damn Clear on the label, that they are not supposed to be used anywhere near sensitive places.

The cosmic justice in this, is that anyone fool enough to skip those directions, will pretty much ensure they aren't going to be passing on their genes for at least a couple of hours also. (VBG)


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