# How to talk wife and friends into a sailing vacation



## TSOJOURNER (Dec 16, 1999)

Any ideas how I can talk my wife and friends of ours into a sailing vaction instead of getting on one of those giant floating hotels? It would be 2 couples, one 16 yr old boy, two 15 yr old girls, and one 9 yr old boy. Likely destination is BVI.


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## TSOJOURNER (Dec 16, 1999)

maybe this will scare them off! I know for myself i'd rather be on a sailing boat in this situation!


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## sailingdog (Mar 19, 2006)

If they don't like to sail... or have never sailed, it might be worth looking at chartering a big crewed catamaran. That way, you can participate in sailing sometime, and be passengers at others... less work, more like a vacation.

Might want to mention the recent outbreaks of disease that have plagued the cruiseline industry as well as the several accidents and people gone missing in recent months...  and pitch a crewed charter as being more luxurious and private than a huge cruise ship would be...


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## sailortjk1 (Dec 20, 2005)

Do you guys sail regularly? 
If not, than take them sailing. Make sure its a nice gentle day with flat seas and moderate winds. Don't take them on a cold rainy windy day. Let them experience the thrill first hand. 
Like the rest of us, If they have the bug, they will be hooked for the rest of their lives. 
I got bored real quick on my first cruise.


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## h16Sailor (Mar 7, 2007)

'how do you talk some one into something?'
I am a therapist and professionally, One person can never talk another person into doing something they don't want to do.

now as a limited sailor who went on a cruise over christmas.
the ONLY thing to do on the cruise ship is Drink. its so very boring.
you see the water 50 feet below you and I hated every moment of it, never going again! not even if it were free. (if you haven't guessed I not a drunk and drinking at 8am is not my thing. ) 

as for a sailing vacation, well its more work. Lots more work and the activity is what is relaxing for me. can't truly describe why i like sailing, lets just say "if i can't touch it, right this second, it does not exist" this liberates me and relaxes my mind.


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## camaraderie (May 22, 2002)

7 people...some unrelated and of the teenaged variety...aboard a charter boat for a week can get a bit close. Are you the only one with sailing experience that would like to do it?
I know this is heresey for me...but talking about renting a cruising CATAMARAN might ease the fears/anxietys of the others. First...there would be more room for everyone. Second it doesn't tilt. Finally...the light winds and beautiful waters of the BVI's make a Cat an ideal platform for swimming, diving and exploring. 
The real benefit of a charter in the VI's compared with a cruise is that everyone will get to see unique and beautiful places that the cruise ships can't get to. You can play all day in the warm water and snorkle on reefs and in caves and enjoy beautiful beaches and little islands. All the islands are in sight of each other and navigation is easy and many people go back year after year to enjoy all the wonderful spots. 
Hopefully some of the above will be useful to you in your mission!!


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## sailingdog (Mar 19, 2006)

Cam-

I wouldn't recommend doing this in a monohull... thought the catamaran part was pretty much a given, especially with the number of people involved—eight people—two couples plus four teeangers—are never going to fit on a chartered boat, unless it is a catamaran. 

The major advantages to being on a catamaran have to do with amount of living space available and the fact that you're not living life at 20˚ tilt on passages.

Also, some of the larger cats can have a sailing dinghy, kayaks, or a windsurfer along... which would really be a tight fit on a monohull.


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## TSOJOURNER (Dec 16, 1999)

Not regularly. I'm the more adventurous person. We have been out several hours at a time on Hobies and Sunfish and I've spent some time on cruisers and am currently taking lessions to obtain some ASA certifications.

I'm looking into a catamaran with a cook and skipper just to make the first trip as easy as possible for everyone else, and then once hooked, I'll bareboat.


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## sailingdog (Mar 19, 2006)

Sounds like a good plan...  Have fun... keep us posted.


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## tommyt (Sep 21, 2002)

Good Plan. My guess is, no matter what the limit on your Visa, they are not going to let you out with a sailing platform for 8 with only Hobie experience. Then again, depends on how business is I guess.


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## sailingdog (Mar 19, 2006)

tommyt said:


> Good Plan. My guess is, no matter what the limit on your Visa, they are not going to let you out with a sailing platform for 8 with only Hobie experience. Then again, depends on how business is I guess.


That's kind of why he's not going bareboat, but getting a skipper...


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## Neises (Feb 24, 2007)

It might pay off later to go with the floating hotel now. When the time's right, mention 'we could do this on our own boat someday'.

Wife & I did a New England & Canada cruise (Princess) last Autumn, loved it. Basically a luxury resort where you wake up somewhere different every morning.


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## TSOJOURNER (Dec 16, 1999)

I completely agree, which is why I'm getting ASA 101/103 currently and planning on ASA 104 on a 46' monohull around Catalina island in October.


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## TSOJOURNER (Dec 16, 1999)

Neises said:


> It might pay off later to go with the floating hotel now. When the time's right, mention 'we could do this on our own boat someday'.
> 
> Wife & I did a New England & Canada cruise (Princess) last Autumn, loved it. Basically a luxury resort where you wake up somewhere different every morning.


Yeah, I'm committed on the cruise. My compromise with myself is to get my SCUBA cert and go on some of the dive excursions. Something else I've always wanted to do.........


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## TSOJOURNER (Dec 16, 1999)

*Take baby steps first*

If I were in your shoes, I would consider doing something on one of the Windjammers in Maine and let someone else be repossible for all the details the first time. For details check out Maine Coast Windjammer Sailing Vacations - Maine Windjammer Association . My wife and I have not done this yet but are considering it. There are a number of large boats but there is actually one I believe that is limited to only 8 or 10 "passengers".

After Maine, check-out chartering on Lake Champlain. This is a great place for newcomers, lots of water, good winds in summer, refreshing water, lots of fun anchorages, and best of all no tides to worry about. A lot easier than Charleston, SC, which is where we learned and got our certifications. One of my seasoned New England sailing friends pointed out, however, that if you do run aground in a lake, you can't wait for the tide to float you off. Finding a charter boat on the lake can be difficult, but if you have trouble let me know and I can point you in the right direction.


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## 42ndstreet (Oct 15, 2004)

i have 2 ideas for you. 
First, take them on a day sail.
Second, order 2 copies of the Cruising guide for BVIs. Once they get a hold of it, they will find lots of great things to do. 
Oh also, the first time we went to the BVIs, I let my wife plan the entire route. She loved the idea, and it made her feel like a big part of it. 
Sometime before the trip, get your wife(first mate I assume) on the wheel and go over hand signals. Yelling at your wife in a mooring field is strictly prohibited LOL.
Oh, get a copy of the video from the charter company.


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## TSOJOURNER (Dec 16, 1999)

*Catamaran*

Agree with advice above, a crewed catamaran would definitely be the way to go. Other things you might mention about BVI charters:


sailing is the ONLY real way to see this part of the world
BVIs are simply one of the worlds most perfect sailing areas, if they don't enjoy it you'll never hassle them for sailing again!
the snorkelling/diving is absolutely out of this world
waters are protected - no waves/sea sickness, or at least it can be avoided
rum punches/good food never more than a swim away
..in bath warm waters

How's that?.

Ben


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## dongreerps (May 14, 2007)

*How to talk wife and friends . . .*

Realistically you have two tasks: getting wife to go on the first charter, and secondly making it so pleasant she will want to go on subsequent sailing vacations.

A previous respondant noted that it is impossible to talk someone into doing something they really don't want to do. He is correct. Your task then is to find out what wife likes to do, and then build the charter trip around wifes desires. In the BVI there are lots of things to do, so make an inventory of what wife wants, and build the trip around her desires: She hates to make the bed in the morning - most cooks will make bunks up in the morning. She hates to cook - hire a cook. She likes to snorkle - buy the guidebook to dive spots in the Virgin Islands, and start highlighting pages. She likes to dine out - get a guidebook, and start highlighting restaurants, (what kind - Italian, barbeque, continental, seafood, etc) and there are lots of great ones down there. She likes to shop - you are in trouble, may have to go over the the USVI. Scuba dive, windsurf, historical sites, etc. If you try and sell sailing, you will lose. If you cater to your wifes desires, you may win.

A cook is probably not worth the extra money. Spend that money provisioning the boat with really great treats. $120.day will buy a lot of Brie, foie, etc.

Your second task is to make the trip so pleasant wife will want to go back again. A captain will really help with this. He will relieve you of responsibility, so there is no screaming at the foredeck to lower the anchor, etc. He will know where the spots your wife will enjoy are - and you can't figure that out from the guide books.

The trip down to the BVI is long. Experienced sailors can do it in one day. Don't. There is a motel in the airport terminal in San Juan (Best Western) which is an acceptable place to stop on the way down. That means you get the first flight out the next morning, get into the BVI late morning, and are out of the harbor by noon. The alternatives are to do a sleep aboard the first night (it will be hot - don't do it), or a room in the BVI (will be inconvenient)

I would insist on being able to communicate with the captain you hire before the trip down there. If the charter base won't set that up, go elsewhere. Tell the captain that you are the boss, and your first order to him is to make your wife happy. You might even ask for a lady skipper.

This is getting too long. I should be happy to expand if you will email me. [email protected]

It is a lot of work to figure out what one's loved one wants to do, and then accomodate to it, instead of trying to fit her into your mould, but the effort may pay off. In lots of ways.

Good luck


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## matthwh610 (Mar 30, 2007)

*Pictures are worth a thousand words*

A lot of good suggestions already so I won't reiterate them. One addition would be to show them what the BVIs look like by using a simple Google Image search. Once they see the beauty of the BVIs it could be hard to resist. Here's what I would show them:

Marina Cay
The Baths
An underwater snorkeling shot
Cane Garden Bay
Zoomed out picture of the islands

Good luck!


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## CalypsoP35 (Jul 24, 2006)

*It can be a great vacation with the right people*

4 years ago I did the BVI bareboat charter with two couples and four kids. My kids were 8 and 10 at the time. While they enjoy sailing, they are not avid sailors, yet they still consider it their favorite vacation of all time (even better than Disney World and much more fun than the one cruise we did take). We are planning on doing it again this winter.

I agree showing pictures is a great place to start. Maybe you can even find some where they show the cattle (passengers) lining up to go on excursions off the the cruise ship.

Be warned, however, that many consider such an excursion as camping on water. So, if you are dealing with high maintenance individuals you could hear some griping. Also, make sure you really get along with the people your going with because you'll be together just about the time.

Finally, unless the adults really dislike cooking while on vacation, I would pass on the cook as well. Some days you'll find restaurants to eat at, and other times you'll just want to take sandwiches onto an isolated beach.


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## TSOJOURNER (Dec 16, 1999)

*BVI tour Google Earth*

Hi,

We just made a tour with Google Earth which may assist:
Here is URL: BVI Google Earth Itinerary

Google Earth is a new discovery - the new way to look at itineraries perhaps, we'll be doing some more for other locations soon!


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## TSOJOURNER (Dec 16, 1999)

*You couldn't keep me from going!!!*

Check out: Cruises - Windjammer Barefoot Cruises

Friends of mine went and had a blast.
I think it's the perfect happy medium.

GTN


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