# Sailing with an 11-month old



## Susan Polkinghorne (Oct 14, 2018)

Hi All,
My husband and I started choosing bare boat chartering as our annual holiday since our honeymoon. We love it and look forward to taking time out to sail more. We have always sailed with babies/kids, but never with a toddler. For our next planned trip our youngest will be 11 months old. Sailing with a baby is "easy" but when they start crawling or walking I am a bit more nervous until the age of 3 when they better understand situations and instructions. Would you avoid sailing in the toddler years or should we just prepare to be extra vigilant? Does anyone have experience? For example, is all the joy of sailing diminished by constant panic/high vigilance? Or alternatively, have you found it to be manageable and enjoyable as a family? 
Advice based upon experience greatly appreciated.
All the best,
Susan


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## Arcb (Aug 13, 2016)

My wife and I sailed a lot when our son was 10 months to 3 years. 

It was abviously not as easy as sailing with older kids or babies, but we felt it was fantastic and really enjoyed it.

Some of our big concerns were head bumps,falls and bug bites (bee stings).

I am not going to say it was easy, but I can't think of any vacation that is easy with a toddler.

My kids are now 4 years and 4 months and we have done 100s miles of dinghy cruising this year, so it's definitely possible and I know both of the kids love it.


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## skipmac (Oct 31, 2007)

We lived on board and cruised with our daughter from 12-18 months. Mostly a great experience but essentially one parent had to be with the daughter full time when underway except when she was taking a nap and barricaded into a cabin.


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## capta (Jun 27, 2011)

I circumnavigated with a child from birth to about 9 years old. We didn't stress at all; the child remained safe whether she liked it or not.
We made a salon settee into a crib by putting netting around it in conjunction with the lee cloth. She was secure and could see us in the cockpit through the companionway when she was in her "crib". I'm not sure how or if you could do this on a bareboat, but perhaps you could request a bareboat with salon settee lee cloths.
This worked well for a few years, mainly because she wasn't isolated and alone as she could always see us. 
But the reality is, if it is necessary to safeguard the child by locking it below and it is unhappy for a while, so be it. The adults cannot be held hostage to an unhappy child when there are things that need doing. Kids are very forgiving and hopefully, this is only a short-term thing. Most should fall asleep after a short time of crying anyway. If you can't do this if necessary, I'd suggest you not take the child sailing. Grandparents could be an alternative?
Our child was *NEVER* allowed out into the cockpit without a person in attendance and *NEVER EVER* on deck without an adult actually holding her hand, especially when underway, for some years. Real tough love on these rules, but she was a full-time liveaboard.


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## 4arch (Jul 7, 2009)

Our girls (3.5 years and 18 months) have both been sailing with us basically since their births on weekends and for occasional longer trips. I agree with and we have followed similar safety protocols to those stated by capta. In addition, both girls have harnesses and tethers that they absolutely must wear anytime they are in the cockpit while underway. Managing the little ones and sailing can be stressful for sure - but the family time and destinations we've been able to experience have been so much more than worth it. We've made memories that truly will last a lifetime. 

I'd also say that trying to start or get back into sailing with a 3 year old would probably be much more challenging than sailing with a 3 year old who'd been doing it all along. Although we still have to watch our oldest like a hawk, she's used to the boat and knows the rules. She feels comfortable moving around the cabin, knows how to use the head, has a bunk where she's comfortable and feels at home, and is even starting to take interest in how the boat and its systems work. I've seen kids around that age who didn't grow up in boating react with morbid fear to even getting on a boat, much less being underway. My wife also once had a landlubber friend bring a 4 year old aboard who had a complete meltdown over using a marine head and absolutely refused to go until we got back to land.


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## caberg (Jul 26, 2012)

Such an individual and personal decision that I don't think anyone else can help you on this one. You know yourselves best and whether you're up for the challenges.

For whatever it's worth, we bought our boat when our son had just turned 3 and he's been on the water almost daily during the summers ever since and we have loved every second of it (ok, almost every second). Looking back at our mindset at that time, I am sure we would have thought nothing of taking him on board at an earlier age if we had owned the boat. But now looking back with our son as a 9 year old, I have to say that it sounds miserable being on a sailboat with a baby and I can't imagine ever wanting to do that today, even though I know we would have done it in a heartbeat when we were in the moment.


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## HobieDogger (Oct 16, 2018)

Our daughter turned one in May and we sailed a number of times with her this season. It is undoubtedly more of an effort, but certainly one that is well worth it. I had to reset my expectations for what type of sailing we’d be doing and made sure our daughter was the focus. 

In my mind there’s nothing better than sharing something you love with the people you love the most.


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## B-to (Oct 21, 2015)

Since you asked here is my 2 cents: 

I have not chartered with an infant, but I did buy my sailboat when my children were 1.5 and 5 years old (they are now 4.5 and 8). Our sailing was strictly day sailing for the first 2 years so we were not on the boat in the evening or overnight back then, and we kept the trips fairly short with frequent stops. This was all very manageable. However, I would think very carefully before chartering with an 11 month old for the following reasons:

As mentioned you need to have the right equipment – infant life vest, infant harness and infant tether. It may take several days if not the entire vacation for your infant to get used to his/her life jacket. They are very uncomfortable at that age due to the requirements of keeping their heads afloat. If you are going somewhere very warm, this will add to their discomfort and you also must keep them in the shade (full Bimini) and cool (these jackets make them very hot – we used a plastic tub in the cockpit as a mini pool to keep him cool and happy). Children who grew up on boats have already acclimated to this as did mine, but it takes time. The harness in my view is interchangeable (and better) and gives them a break from the vest, but also has its own discomfort for an infant who will not initially like the immobility. 
As mentioned, you must keep a strict watch. Infants do not understand the edge of the boat is danger, and will constantly squirm and seek out the most dangerous places on the boat. This will become tiring and one adult must be dedicated to watching the infant at all times. It there are just two adults that means one is solo sailing (which may be fine as I did, but just be prepared and ensure the boat set up and your skills are up for it). Keep in mind an infant overboard is not a standard MOB, the life vest may keep them face up, but just as likely face down IMHO, and they lack the strength and skill necessary to right themselves, so that can never be an option. I completely agree with Capta about constant attention above or locked down below, which can be managed for short day sails, but do you really want to do that for a week-long vacation charter? I would also be more concerned about night time on deck if they are not use to that environment and again would need constant watch/tethered. 

Once they reach 4, it is a different ball game. I am amazed at the skill of my 4 year old around the boat, and one hand on the boat is pretty natural to him now, he always wears his vest but is a good swimmer if he falls overboard (which he actually did once while we were anchored and fishing- went right through the lifelines).


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## pdqaltair (Nov 14, 2008)

(Other than keeping it fun) The most important thing was a full-body harness that really fit, and that is a moving target. One that you would be comfortable holding the child high in the air with, at any orientation.

Everyone says PFD. That's what the law says. But picture the kid falling off the boat. That is utterly unacceptable. If there are two of you, one will jump in. That's not what the books say, but it is what will happen. Is the water cold? Is it dark? Can the other person easily bring the boat back, alone, and pick you both up, whatever the conditions? Pretty tough.

You've got to keep the kid on board, and a harness is a good start. Perfect fit, even if you have to modify it, which you probably will.

---

That said, yeah we went sailing and cruising (bigger boat than in my avitar) when my daughter was small. We were vigilant and it was worth every minute.

edit: Actually, now that I think about it, we had a Stiletto 27 when she was that size. No lifelines. We were careful and it was great. Obviously, she was never alone, not for one second.


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## paulk (Jun 2, 2000)

We chartered a houseboat (Pénichette) in France for a week, two weeks after our daughter started to walk. As pdq suggests, we got a harness for her and a leash so that she could toddle across and along the cabintop without making us crazy. We went with another couple who brought their infant as well (similarly equipped) , so there were always enough hands to work the ship and watch the kids. Baby gates were useful in blocking off berths to make playpens. Having trusted "babysitters" with us meant we could take turns going out to dinner sans children.


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## Scotty C-M (Aug 14, 2013)

I agree with what everybody else said!! There's a big difference between your own boat and a charter boat. On your boat you can set up all the equipment for the kids. We always blocked off the forepeak as kids territory. Lots of books and games. A charter boat may not be as familiar territory for kids. We have 3 children - and now 6 grandkids - and they've all been sailing since they were born. 

Outside the cabin the little ones are teathered. How little? It depends on circumstance - but at least three. And it is definitely one persons job to watch the kids. Ideally one adult per kid, but that is seldom possible, but at least one person who has no other responsibility. I used what I consider common sense, making shorter passages, and finding calmer waters.


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