# Waiter or waitress when fine dining?



## deniseO30 (Nov 27, 2006)

I like service from a very very mannerly "nothing I won't do to make Ma'am happy" waiter. Bow tie optional!


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## deniseO30 (Nov 27, 2006)

Ok.. to qualify the sailing aspect.. after a ladies group is just back from a few weeks at sea....


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## T37Chef (Oct 9, 2006)

The term used these days is "server"


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## deniseO30 (Nov 27, 2006)

waitperson is what I use most of the time chef, but to be specific..


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## rockDAWG (Sep 6, 2006)

Well, I am a pig. I prefer young and beautiful waitresses. If a waiter shows up at our table, I will kindly request to trade for another one. 

I think I am not as bad as others. At least I have not posted a thread "Looking for Young Female Boat Mate, no experience needed" yet.


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## jephotog (Feb 25, 2002)

I was a waiter for 10 years in many a fine dinning environments. Used it to pay for my ski bumming ways. Then used to pay for my education as a pilot. To understand the mindset of a waiter understand the word obsequious. We are there to serve. Their income is based on your happiness and perceived quality of the job they have done. In short they will respond to anything you call them. 

I did make the mistake once of calling a woman mam who felt she was too young for the title. You need a thick skin to work as a server sometimes. I once found New Yorkers respect you more if you are a slight bit hostile if they act up. I have been called all sorts of names but do not care as long as your bill was over $100 and you left %20. Probably server is the most appropriate term, but if the staff is mixed asking for your waitress might make it easier for the other person to narrow it down.

PS: I made more money as a waiter than I do as a pilot.


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## smackdaddy (Aug 13, 2008)

jephotog said:


> I was a waiter for 10 years in many a fine dinning environments. Used it to pay for my ski bumming ways. Then used to pay for my education...


Exactly the same here during college. I was also a Maître d' at one point - and for high-end "fine dining" I can say that the best, most successful servers were always male. At lower-end places - it didn't matter as much.

Whether that was due to customer expectations, cultural issues, or what, I don't know. My hunch is that high-end customers just like smart, witty, handsome dudes serving them. It seems to imply more value - for whatever reason. And this is pretty fascinating in itself considering our "advanced, open" culture.

High end cuisine is a very weird world. But jeez you can rake in some coin. And the hostesses were always hot.


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## cormeum (Aug 17, 2009)

I refuse to get caught up in PC garbage.  

Male: Waiter
Female: Waitress.


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## deniseO30 (Nov 27, 2006)

Well I was with a group of ladies in the social group I try to lead up. We were at a local place. not 5 star but very nice. We had a male server. the service was over the top! (good) but then we had a female server a month latter and she was tops also! So gender and service don't really matter, but I like a male sever just the same.


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## St Anna (Mar 15, 2003)

deniseO30 said:


> So gender and service don't really matter, but I like a *male sever* just the same.


Now Freud would write volumes on this 'typo'
are you saving your R's??

I have a unique sense of humour - only I laugh at my jokes sometimes!
Oh well - I know my limitations


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## deniseO30 (Nov 27, 2006)

s e r v e r


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## smackdaddy (Aug 13, 2008)

St Anna said:


> Now Freud would write volumes on this 'typo'
> are you saving your R's??
> 
> I have a unique sense of humour - only I laugh at my jokes sometimes!
> Oh well - I know my limitations


Whatever you do, DON'T ORDER THE SCHNITZEL!


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## deniseO30 (Nov 27, 2006)

A waiter in leaderhosen? cute!


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## T37Chef (Oct 9, 2006)

*Stars, Stars, and more stars*

So what is 5 Star to you guys...do you have any idea the difference between stars, diamonds, Michelin, Mobil, Zagat, NY Times, etc?

Okay, then I will tell you...:laugher 

In the US there are several rating systems being used, to the point it seems confusing or unnecassary...

Mobil Travel Guide awards "stars" as does the Michelin Guide, Mobil goes to 5 Stars, Michelin highest is 3 Stars. As for Mobil, the difference between a 4 star property and a 5 start property are significant. I am not as familiar with Michelin as they are primarily used in Europe, only coming to America in the last few years. Thomas Keller's The French Laundry and Per Se are 3 Michelin Stars, making him one of the few to have two restaurants with 3 stars, and I think the only one in the US. Mobil awards Start for Food and/or Accommodations.
AAA awards Diamonds, 5 being the highest. Again the differences between 4 and 5 are significant and they also award for Food and/or Accommodations. The standards for 5 Diamonds vs. 5 Stars (Mobil) are slightly less there fore it holds slightly less "prestige" then having the Mobil 5 Star Award. The Inn at Little Washington in Virginia, was the first establishment in the Mobil Travel Guides history ever to receive two 5 Star awards, food & accommodations. The Inn has maintained 5 Diamonds & 5 Stars for both Food & Accommodations for the past 18+ years, that is no easy accomplishment if you ever saw what an inspector is looking for. 
Well then there are local Newspapers, The NY Times 1- 4 Stars, The Washington Post 1- 4 stars, Washingtonian, bla bla bla.
Zagat...they are unique, using reader surveys to develop their rating, 0-30 for Food, Decor, Service, or a total of 90 points possible...and here again The Inn at Little Washington ranks high, #1 restaurant in the Nations Capital 
Travel & Leisure Magazine, Worlds Best Awards, The Wine Spectator Awards, and many more (oh and by the way, TIALW...#1 Hotel in the World for food by T&L Mag 2008  ) 
Of course there are membership organizations also, such as the prestigious Relais & Chataeux http://www.relaischateaux.com/en/ and the very cool S.Pellegrino World's 50 Best Restaurants http://www.theworlds50best.com/awards/1-50-winners , What makes the S.Pellegrino awards neat is they are voted in by their peers, chefs & restaurateurs. 
Some interesting info found in Wiki about "stars":
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Star_(classification)

I recommend Zagat, Mobil, Relais & Chateaux as good references, but at the end of the day its what you think that matters 

Okay...I don't know what the point of writing all that was


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## deniseO30 (Nov 27, 2006)

Knows better then to ever confront a chef on such matters.. eep!

if you ever "ask to see the chef" you better be sure you know why! LOL


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## St Anna (Mar 15, 2003)

Hi Debuse,
I guess Chef thought people rate restuarants by the meal they provide. 

The visual presentation of the food is more what was being discussed???

I do agree - never insult a chef. Art with attitude and sharp (and blunt) objects. I think I will sign off now.
cheerio


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## deniseO30 (Nov 27, 2006)

Sadly, I say most ratings are ignorant of the presentation and more about the service then the food. I could be wrong though.

Watched this Disney movie last night.. "ratatouille" EWWWWW! rats as chefs! I wonder if the Disney people really understand the vile nature of rats.


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## T37Chef (Oct 9, 2006)

Ah yes, Ratatouille...a great movie. There's so much neat references in the movie, just the description of the classic kitchen brigade is worth showing in class LOL. I liked the pun created by using rats to cook, cracks me up. Incidentally Thomas Keller (arguably one of toady's most influential chefs) was the consultant on the film, and many of the dishes were first created in his kitchen then digitized for the movie.


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## T37Chef (Oct 9, 2006)

St Anna said:


> Hi Debuse,
> I guess Chef thought people rate restuarants by the meal they provide.


As I mentioned at the bottom of my post, I have NO idea why I posted that  Probably trying to avoid grading student projects!  :laugher


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## sailingdog (Mar 19, 2006)

Just senility showing its ugly self...  :laugher


T37Chef said:


> As I mentioned at the bottom of my post, I have NO idea why I posted that  Probably trying to avoid grading student projects!  :laugher


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## T37Chef (Oct 9, 2006)

Look, CD is reading this thread...I see you CD...you're almost like a lurker now...WTH? 

SD, did you say someting???


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## bljones (Oct 13, 2008)

I really don't care whether the droid in the paper hat is male or female, if i wanted freakin' fries with my order, i woulda asked for 'em!

Now that I got that off my chest, as per fine dining, i really don't care whether the droid refilling the buffet is male or female, just so long as they keep the peel and eat shrimp bin filled!


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## smackdaddy (Aug 13, 2008)

bljones said:


> I really don't care whether the droid in the paper hat is male or female, if i wanted freakin' fries with my order, i woulda asked for 'em!
> 
> Now that I got that off my chest, as per fine dining, i really don't care whether the droid refilling the buffet is male or female, just so long as they keep the peel and eat shrimp bin filled!


Good lord you're hopeless.


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## deniseO30 (Nov 27, 2006)

I like a bow tie serving my caviar


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## bljones (Oct 13, 2008)

oooooohhhhh, caviar! What buffet do you go to, Denise?


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## deniseO30 (Nov 27, 2006)

Ok... I should re-phrase.. "When I could afford it" 
Now I can tell you were every Chinese buffet and old country buffet are in a 100 mile radius LOL


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